Carver: Past Lies (Adair Empire Book 5) Read online

  Carver

  “Hang on, Dimitri. We can’t just…fuck!” King is growling at D as I come downstairs, and when I see everyone gathered in front of the war room become silent upon seeing me, I know something’s up.

  “What?” I snap. In the past few weeks, I’ve become more bloodthirsty than normal. I’ve yet to take a man’s life. Prove that I am what Meadow is afraid of because she’s afraid of that man. I want to show her that I have self-control.

  Even if there hasn’t been a moment where Mercy has been blood-free since I came home.

  I can’t find the peace she gave me, and the frustration eats at me, so I hunt. For predators, betrayers, whoever pisses me off most, and I drop their bloody bodies on the steps of whatever precinct is closest.

  When no one answers my question, I head for the dungeon. Thomas is still alive only because I want him to suffer for as long as the girls have. With Lilith ready to give birth in the next few weeks, I don’t want to stress her more by killing the man.

  “Fuck. Carver, wait,” Luther calls, still sporting the black eye I gave him.

  “What?”

  “Meadow.” I turn again. I can’t fucking hear her name. The pain rips through me like a freight train. “She’s fucking missing, Carver.” Everything in me freezes. A lead weight sits on my chest. Fear tightens my heart, and blood rushes through my ears as loud as rock concert.

  I spin around. Not saying a word. My vision clouds red as rage filters out the rest of my emotions. “How?”

  “Danika says she went to the library two nights ago and hasn’t been home since.” Dimitri looks uncertain as he explains.

  My mind is stuck on two nights.

  Two nights she’s been out there.

  Two nights she’s been missing.

  Two nights she should have been in my arms.

  I don’t know what happens next, but I hear a deafening roar just as pain filters through my hand and up my arm. Blood trickles down the wall beside me as my breathing picks up, sawing in and out of my chest. I feel like I’ve left my body, and I’m watching everything that happens around me from afar.

  As my fist plows through the plaster in the walls.

  As I toss Cas and Dimitri from my back while they try to pull me away.

  The rage and fear viciously consumes me. Murder devours my mind, and until Meadow is safe in my arms, nothing will stop my destruction.

  “Find her.” My lungs heave with exertion as my brothers watch me.

  Dimitri’s eyes express an understanding while everyone else’s holds worry.

  “Carver?” I hear Lilith come in from the front door. She walks into King’s open arms as the rest of the girls head to their men, and I have to turn from the sight. It only enrages me further because Meadow should have been with them.

  “I’ll kill everyone,” I roar as I head back up to my room. My weapons locker is my only destination.

  King

  “He’s going to burn everything down until he finds her,” Luther mutters as Carver walks away.

  For ten years, I’ve watched that man with respect and admiration. Not once have I worried about him.

  Until now.

  “He is,” I say as I lead my queen into my office, concern in her stare.

  “You’re going to let him?” Atticus scoffs.

  I look at my men, their women, our families. The answer is simple. “I’d let any of you. With him, I’ll help because, in the end, it’s going to show her that as evil as he can be and as murderous as he is, he will risk everything for her but never risk them.”

  “Meadow?” Lil asks as she stops in front of me.

  “She’s missing,” I confirm.

  Sucking in a sharp breath, her gaze strays to the open door where Dimitri is standing and to the stairs Carver’s gone up. “He’s going to kill anyone in his way.”

  Dimitri looks to us then. “I’m going to help him.”

  “I’ve got surveillance pulled up,” Cas announces from his spot at my desk. The man never fails. Taught Daniel everything he knows, too. It’s why the younger man is so valuable to us.

  “And?” Dimitri asks walking closer.

  “She didn’t make it inside. Someone caught her off-guard.” We all watch as she falls down the steps, and her head cracks off the concrete. A quick flash of the perpetrator’s face is shown.

  “Get Carver. Now.” He’s followed her around campus enough to know most of the faces there. He might recognize this guy.

  7

  Meadow

  Groggy, I try to lift my head as I hear water from the faucet slowly dripping. The constant tap, tap, tap has worn on my last nerve. It’s all I’ve heard since I’ve been here. I don’t know how long it’s been, who he is, or if anyone has noticed I’m missing. Again.

  I know nothing but the urge to rip the sink from the wall and the weakness permeating my bones. After drinking the first bottle of water and almost immediately feeling the effects of a drug, I haven’t touched anything I’ve been given.

  Tied to a bed, my rope only reaches as far as the bucket my abductor has left for a toilet in the room. I can’t get to the sink to shut it off, grab a drink, nothing. I haven’t eaten or slept much since he stopped bringing me liquids. Every once in a while, I’ll hear slamming doors and heavy footsteps from somewhere nearby, but no one shows up when I scream myself hoarse.

  It’s like we’re in the middle of nowhere, and for all I know, that’s true. My stomach finally stopped hurting before I passed out the last time, and I fear what that means because I don’t know how much time has passed.

  My tears have even dried up. My mouth is drier than the Sahara, and my head pounds. I know I’m in the stages of dehydration. It’s been forever since I last peed, and the weakness in simply opening my eyes leaves me exhausted.

  “Please,” I whisper hoarsely.

  “Will you drink now?” A faraway voice asks.

  My head rolls in the direction of the sound and without permission, I say yes.

  The door opens, and there he is, the man from the library. The one I know but don’t, with an open bottle of water. And at the last second, as I take the first swallow, I remember. “No,” I moan and shake my head, or at least I think I do. But it’s too late. I feel it already. My stomach revolts from the cool liquid as it hits the empty organ, but the damage is done.

  The drugs are ingested, and I’m off to la-la land again.

  I don’t know what’s happening. How I got here. If it’s a light shining on me, or if I’m dying, and it’s the pearly gates.

  I do know my wrists are strung up, my legs are holstered in some sort of mechanism that lifts them into whatever position he wants.

  I know I’m wearing nothing but my bra and panties. I feel an ache deep inside me and fear crashes through me. “No, no, no,” I cry, terrified he took something from me, and I couldn’t fight him off. “Carver.” I whisper his name like a prayer in the hopes he’ll find his way to me again. I pray he feels my suffering, that he knows I need him.

  “He’s not coming for you, my dear. You’re all mine. Your parents don’t care, nor your sister or your lover. You’re all for me now, sweet Meadow.” His voice slithers along my flesh like a snake. “You’ll be my pretty, little toy forever.” Happiness radiates from his statement, and I wish I had the energy to disclaim him, but I don’t.

  Carver.

  Come for me.

  Carver

  Three days.

  Seventy-two hours.

  Four thousand, three hundred twenty minutes.

  Two hundred fifty-nine thousand, two hundred seconds.

  That’s how long I haven’t known where Meadow is. How long I’ve been awake. How long I’ve agonized and feared for her life.

  Five days is how long she’s been missing, though.

  Over one hundred hours she’s been in fear.

  She isn’t just missing; however, she’s been taken like a piece of garbage. She’s gone in the wind.

  No one is
speaking to me. Not after I nearly gutted Cas two days ago. The girls were banned from the war room for their safety before we left. My instincts have settled on kill only, and they won’t change until I have Meadow back.

  Despite my rage, I still haven’t ended Thomas. Though, how he still breathes baffles me. He’s taken everything I’ve given him as well as whatever Dimitri has dished out. His days are numbered, and he’s finally accepted the errors of his ways. He’s seen the evil he tried to penetrate and prays for his death. Begs for it even, and I think that’s the only reason why Mercy hasn’t found her way through his heart.

  Leaning back in the chair, I close my eyes and breathe deeply, trying to recall the raptured pleasure of weeks ago when Meadow was in my arms. The feelings that overcame us has cracked my black heart open wide.

  I should be mad at her now. She made me fucking care. Gave me something I’ve searched my entire fucking life for then took it away in the blink of an eye.

  But I understand.

  I understand her fear like it’s my own because that’s what soulmates are.

  Lil has been pounding it into my head for weeks that Meadow and I are meant to be together. Daily, she’s reminded me I have to be patient.

  I’ve done that. I’ve shown restraint.

  Carver.

  The way she sighs my name jumpstarts my heart rate.

  Save me.

  I can feel my frown at her voice.

  Carver.

  I could almost swear that she’s in the room with me. Except it appears we’re in an area with a stage and what looks like a marionette hanging from the roof.

  Please.

  Instead of being in my arms, she’s strung up, being controlled.

  “What the fuck?” I mutter.

  Carver.

  My eyes pop open wide, Cas and Dimitri look up at me as I lean forward, trying to make sense of what the fuck just happened.

  “You alright, man?” Cas asks as he stands, making his way over to me.

  I shake the image from my head because it can’t possibly be real. “No.” I walk over to the window in our hotel room near her dorms. I wanted to be as close to her as possible until I find her.

  “Talk to me, Carver,” Cas insists.

  “You’ll think I’m fucking nuts, man,” I tell him with a cold laugh.

  “Try me.”

  “She was in my arms. It’s fucking heaven when she holds me, man. Never known anything like it. But then she’s on a stage, and I can hear her voice, but not things she’s said to me before. But she’s there, here.” I tap my temple. “And I can’t get the image out of my mind.”

  “What is it?”

  “She’s a fucking marionette. Strings and all on a stage. Dancing, but there’s fear in her eyes.” Snorting, I look at him. “Fucking nuts, man.” I expect him to agree.

  “D, see if there are any theatres around here that specialize in live marionette shows. It’s likely going to be an abandoned one.” He doesn’t look at me like I’m crazy. “Don’t dismiss it, Carve, not yet.”

  Dropping back into the chair, I hang my head in my hands. I fucking hate how useless I feel right now. I hate that she’s out there going through God knows what, and I’m stuck here in this stuffy fucking hotel doing nothing.

  “Alright, here’s what I’ve got.” Dimitri waits until I look up. “One in Chapel Hill, two in Burlington, and six in Raleigh. All abandoned in the past ten years. Two in Raleigh are monitored.” He scrolls down the screen further. “One in Burlington was torn down last week. That leaves us with six to hunt through.”

  “Too fucking many,” I mutter.

  “You were the Fed, D, what’s your gut telling you?” Cas asks him. He’s proven on more than one occasion that he can be trusted.

  Scrubbing a hand down his face, he hesitates in his answer. “There’s something over by Waterford that’s caught my eye, but it’s not a theatre.”

  “What’s special about it?” I ask.

  “The warehouse has been soundproofed and abandoned. No security. Nothing around it for miles.”

  “Why’s it interest you, D?” Cas’ patience is wearing as thin as my own.

  “Because a few years ago, it was used as a rave location and busted multiple times for drugs. If he wants to hide her, mask any sounds she makes but stay close, this is it.”

  “Let’s go.” I don’t hesitate. If Dimitri thinks this is it, then I trust him to know what the fuck he’s talking about.

  Meadow

  Twirl…

  Leap…

  Bow…

  My exhausted limbs do as he commands. My muscles shake from exertion and lack of sustenance. Sweat cascades from my pores like the leaky faucet in my locked room.

  Chime…

  Crash…

  Boom…

  The beat of the music continues as my captor stands. To what audience I have no idea, but to him, they’re here, and they’re real. I can barely hold my head up, so I haven’t a clue.

  I’m the puppet, and he’s my master. When the music ends so does my show. I’ve long since gone numb to the cold I feel from what I’ve discovered is a warehouse. The chill is constant, and I’m never given a reprieve.

  He dumps cold water on my head when I pass out from hunger, the cold, or the drugs he puts in my water to make me pliable.

  What if he does something to me when I’m unconscious? I have no idea. I feel it, though. The soreness, the bruising. Something has happened.

  I don’t speak to him. I’ve stopped crying. Praying was lost long ago.

  Carver isn’t coming for me, not after I sent him away. Not when I cursed myself to a fate that broke his heart. I deserve everything I’m getting and more from this...this creature. I can’t even call him a man. A man wouldn’t do this. A man wouldn’t possess this obsession with dolls the way he does.

  Late into the night I hear him. The way he talks to the broken figures laying around the floors, in dark corners, set up on shelves. He worships them. Loves them, even. He craves something he believes they can provide and has yet to receive.

  I feel the strings from the roof loosening as he lowers me back to the stage. A spotlight is still shining, the red curtains are drawn shut, and I wish I had the strength and energy to move. To untie myself and fight back. Take away what he’s looking for. But I don’t.

  I’m helpless as my release is slowed down until my head is laying gently on the floor. The cool wood feels soft against my cheek. I close my eyes and try to remember a time when I was happy. A time that gave me a semblance of peace, and all I think about is Carver…

  Exiting my dorm building, I’m walking with Danika as we head to our first pre-law class of the day, and I can feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. Stopping, I look around slowly for anyone out of place.

  “Meadow, let’s go,” Nika calls—a nickname she’s told me she prefers. I wouldn’t say we’re friends or even enemies, but we’ve come to a common middle ground of favoring each other more to the stuck-up people around us. She doesn’t have a lot of patience on the best days, and today has been a bad one for her.

  “You don’t feel that?” I ask her, still looking around me.

  She shrugs. “Probably one of my brother’s goons watching me again.”

  “Goons?” I don’t know much about Danika, but I do know her family is some big thing back in Russia. The mafia or something.

  Her light laugh at my naïveté makes her stop. “I know you hear things, Meadow. You’re not so sheltered to know that the Vashchenkos run the Eastern seaboard in the underground world.” I shrug this time. I didn’t know that specifically. “Besides, with the beast following you around constantly, you must know some things.”

  “Beast?”

  “Carver Rivers.” The way she says his name with a warning and a touch of fear, I have to wonder about the man. “He’s evil incarnate.”

  “He is?” The man has never been anything but watchful of me. Even that first time he came to our h
ome, when I could see he wanted to cause my father harm, his entire demeanor softened when he looked at me.

  As he watched my tears and cries of disbelief.

  Even now, after so many weeks of him being around, calling him a beast seems more of an insult.

  Carver Rivers may be a monster to some, but to me, he’s a shadow of light.

  I still remember the way Danika said his name with so much fear, the way others shrunk in his presence. He elicits terror from anyone who crosses his path, except me. Even after he rescued me from Thomas, after the apprehension and emotions subsided, I knew he wouldn’t harm me.

  Carver is dark to the rest of the world. He’s the evil that even the vilest people run from, and I have to wonder if my jailor knows who he is.

  “Carver Rivers,” I murmur as he approaches. His steps slow then falter as my voice reaches his ears. “Carver,” I whisper again. “He’ll come for you. In the day or in the night, he’ll be there.”

  “He’s an illusion. Not as evil as people say.” I detect the tremor in his tone.

  “So why are you scared?”

  Carver

  All these feelings, the affection, worry, fear—everything Meadow has brought forth in me—I have to stifle. I turn them off as easily as a light switch because if I don’t, I’m going to go fucking mad.

  Dimitri was right about where she’s being held, and either this guy is clueless or thinks that he’s that good, but there was no security beyond a locked door. Cas was able to penetrate that easily enough with a lock pick.

  As soon as we enter, the music from what sounds like the annoying shit on a merry-go-round assaults us. We search the hallways, empty rooms, downstairs, upstairs, anywhere there might be for him to hide himself or Meadow.